Poker Blog and Poker Gossip

A while ago we wrote about a pedophile scammer getting OWNED hard on the Internet.  So, I was playing a little 2/4 Limit on Poker stars tonight and noticed an interesting username:  NickNSX.

At first I thought, this name sounds real familiar so I googled it.  When I remembered where it was from, I thought that there was no way this guy would be dumb enough to show up on the Internet using that username, so I decided to ask him in the chat:

ME: OMG are you the famous NSX Nick?
NickNSX: wat do u want
ME: hahaha… it is u.. u sick child molestor
NickNSX: hahaha

Wow… so Nick does live.  If you haven’t heard of this story you gotta read that link above.  Definitely good for a laugh!

Here is the screenshot of his account:

Head over to Pokerstars and try and take Nick’s money!

Here’s an idea – let’s host a pretend 900 person poker tournament and give each player a mask or a bag to put over there heads. That way, no one can know whom they’re playing or pick up on tells. Do you think the tournament directors of the world would allow such a thing? They let Phil Laak do it during this years World Series of Poker…

That’s the premise of the post by some moron called “OnceUpon” over at 2P2 (http://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/29/news-views-gossip/poker-masks-306265/) and while I’m not sure what’s he getting at with this post, this reply summed it up perfectly:

“zomg we can’t see faces! it’s like online poker!”

While the post seems a little silly, it would be an interesting social experiment. Take a crowd of players and have everyone wear masks. No one can speak and you wouldn’t know if Phil Ivey or Joe The Plumber was sitting next to you. Let it play out and as players are eliminated, they remove the mask.

Would it ever happen? Probably not but it’s still an interesting proposition. As much as the pro players love prop bets maybe they could do this on a smaller scale. Even better, take the High Stakes Poker show that comes on GSN and spin off a new Halloween special with everyone wearing masks. Too bad we missed the chance already this year but perhaps if enough of you send this article to the top brass at GSN.com, we may see this thing become a reality.

Filed under the category of “the dumbest shit we’ve read today” comes this little press release from a site called CircusCasino.com (Link bait, I know but I’ll play along). So these folks have hired a real-deal “personologist”, aka a face reader to tell us the top traits that winning poker players have. According to this person the best traits for a winning poker player include cupped-out ears, a Roman nose, and wide set eyes. Interesting that they didn’t mention gold chains, rings, and bracelets. What about the wet hair look, ala Scotty Nguyen?

Taking the silliness one step further, they even posted a picture of what the ultimate poker player would look like. Patrick Antonius? WRONG. It’s this guy:

You’re damn right son, this is the face of the ultimate poker player. It’s the facial traits of:
1. Roman nose of Chris Moneymaker
2. Wide-set eyes of Jerry Yang
3. Head width of Greg Raymer & Noel Furlong
4. Sloped-back forehead of Robert Varkonyi
5. High forehead of Carlos Montensen
6. Jutting chin of Scotty Nguyen
7. Outer corner of the eye of Joseph Hachem
8. Cupped out ears of Chris Ferguson (funny, I would picked Gus Hansen for this one)
9. Flared outer edge of the eyebrow of Jamie Gold
10. That “Axe body spray covering up my ass stank” smell from Mike Matusow (ok, we made this one up but it’s true)

So if you happen to find this guy walking the street, let him know we’d like to stake him in the 2009 WSOP.

Source http://www.prweb.com/releases/2008/9/prweb1239884.htm

Playing poker after a few drinks is a BAD IDEA.  All too often it seems that I lose the most money playing poker when I am drunk.  After a few drinks I get “the urge” to gamble, and start making stupid plays based on greed.  Your calling range goes way up and you think that you are probably going to hit your gutshot straight draw. When you drink, all you want to do is WIN, and often this means you will make stupid calls in hopes of sucking out for the win.

Here are 5 tips to avoid playing online poker after you have been drinking:
1) Hide your laptop (or get someone else to do this for you).  If you can’t find your computer it will be hard to play.
2) Pick up a girl/guy when you are drinking.  If you bring home someone from the opposite sex, chances are poker will be the last thing on your mind.
3) Withdrawal before going out.  If there is no money in your accounts, it will make it harder to play.
4) Drink more than usual.  If you get too drunk, you will probably not even be able to turn on your computer as you will probably be spending most of your time hovering over the toilet.
5) Phone a friend.  If you get the urge to play, work out a deal with a friend where you can call them and they will talk you out of it.

Preserve your poker bankroll, and don’t succumb to playing when you aren’t in the right mind state.

Disclaimer for the above points. We can not he held responsible if you:
1) Never find your laptop
2) Pick up an ugly guy/girl
4) Drink too much that you do something really stupid, or hurt yourself.

This post is intended for Entertainment Purposes only, but in all seriousness, DON’T PLAY POKER DRUNK!

Received this email today… this is classic:

“This year, my company decided that we could have alcohol at our company picnic, but because of liability issues, we were only allowed one (1) drink per person…

I was fired for ordering the cups.”